HOWARD’S DAILY CHRONICLE
NUMBER 26 VOL 6
JANUARY 28TH2008
WEATHER; WARM, MED HUMIDITY,
GAS PRICES STILL SAME AS YESTERDAY
NOT MUCH DOING TODAY! TALKED TO CHAR MILLIGAN IN CALIFORNIA, MY GRADE AND HIGH SCHOOL FRIEND! IF YOU REMEMBER HER GRANDSON WAS IN THE HOSPITAL IN A COMA! WELL, THERE’S NO CHANGE! ALL THEY CAN DO IS BE THERE INCASE HE WAKES UP, SHE GOES EVERY OTHER DAY AND HER SON, THE BOYS FATHER GOES EVERY OTHER DAY! I ASKED IF THEY HAD GOTTEN A SECOND OPINION AND SHE SAID THEY’VE GOTTEN 5 DIFFERENT DOCTORS TO LOOK INTO THE PROBLEM AND THEY ALL SAY THE SAME THING, THEY DON’T KNOW WHAT HAS CAUSED IT! HE HAS BEEN CHECKED FOR DRUGS AND ALCOHOL AS A PRECAUTION AND ALL TEST CAME BACK NEGATIVE IT’S REALLY STRANGE SOMEONE HASN’T FOUND OUT WHAT HAS CAUSED THIS?
JOKE
A MAN WALKED OUT OF HIS HOUSE TO GET THE LOCAL NEWSPAPER OFF THE DRIVEWAY AND HE NOTICED HIS NEIGHBOR SPRINKLING SOMETHING ON HIS FRONT LAWN! OUT OF COUROSITY HE ASKED HIM WHAT HE WAS SPRINKLING AND THE NEIGHBOR SAID; “PREFUME”! “WHY IN THE WORLD ARE YOU SPRINKLING PERFUME ON YOUR LAWN?” AND THE MAN ANSWERED; “TO KEEP THE ELEPHANTS AWAY”! THE FIRST MAN SAYS; “THERE ISN’T AN ELEPHANT WITHIN 3000 MILES OF HERE”! THE SECOND MAN ANSWERS; “I KNOW, EFFECTIVE ISN’T IT”!
JOKE
EVERY SUNDAY MORNING WITHOUT FAIL THIS MANS NEIGHBOR IS OUT AT 6AM MOWING HIS FRONT LAWN WITH A GAS POWERED MOWER WITH NO MUFFLER! NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES MAN #1 ASK HIM TO WAIT TILL LATER IN THE DAY THE NEIGHBOR STILL INSIST THAT THE BEST TIME TO MOW HIS LAWN IS BETWEEN 5AM AND 7AM SO HE DECIDED TO START AT 6AM!
THE MAN WITH THE MOWER HAD JUST BOUGHT A NEW VOLKSWAGON AND ASKED THE 1ST MAN IF HE HAD ANY IDEA HOW MUCH MILEAGE HE COULD EXPECT HONESTLY? THE 1ST MAN ANSWERED HE WASN’T SURE BUT HE’D HEARD THEY GOT REAL GOOD GAS MILAGE! EVERY NIGHT ABOUT MIDNIGHT THE 1ST MAN WOULD SNEAK OVER AND POUR 1-5 GALLONS OF GAS IN THE FUEL TANK! WHEN THEY MET OUT IN THE FRONT YARD THE MAN WITH THE VW CLAIMED HE WAS GETTING 225 MILES PER GALLON AND SURE LIKED HIS NEW CAR!
WHEN IT CAME TIME FOR THE MAN WITH THE VW TO TAKE IT IN FOR A CHECK UP HE TOLD THE SERVICE MANAGER NOT TO DO ANYTHING WITH THE ENGINE, JUST CHANGE THE OIL AND FILTER AND CHECK IT OVER! WHEN THE MAN BROUGHT THE CAR HOME FROM THE DEALER AND PARKED IT IN THE DRIVEWAY HE LOOKED REAL COCKY! THE MAN THAT HAD BEEN POURING THE EXTRA GAS IN THE TANK EVERY NIGHT STOPPED DOING IT! THREE DAYS LATER THE MAN WITH THE VW TOLD THE MAN WHO HAD BEEN POURING IN THE EXTRA GAS THAT HE WAS GOING TO SUE THE DEALER FOR TAKING WHATEVER GAVE THE GOOD MILEAGE OUT OF THE CAR WHEN HE HAD IT IN FOR THE SERVICE, HIS MILEAGE DROPPED FROM 225 MPG TO 35-40 MPG!
THE MAN WHO DID THE POURING NEVER DID TELL THE VW OWNER ABOUT ADDING GAS TO THE TANK BUT, HE FIGURED HE GOT THE REVENGE HE WANTED BECAUSE THE MAN HAD A MUFFLER PUT ON HIS MOWER AND DIDN’T BOTHER HIM ANYMORE!
OK, HERE’S MORE ABOUT MY EARLY YEARS AT NEWPORT BEACH!
THE THINGS I’VE WRITTEN ABOUT SO FAR TOOK PLACE BETWEEN 1936 AND 1940! NOW I’LL WRITE ABOUT THINGS BETWEEN 1940 AND 1942!
I ENDED WITH WHERE I GOT THE NICK NAME “NOT JOHN!”
THE MEN AT THE MARINE SHOP TREATED ME LIKE THEY DIDN’T MIND MY COMING AROUND BECAUSE I DIDN’T BUTT INTO THEIR TALKS AND DIDN’T TOUCH ANYTHING, I JUST SAT AND LISTENED BECAUSE IT WAS INTERESTING TO HEAR WHAT THEY TALKED ABOUT, MAINLY DIFFERENT JOBS THEY WERE DOING OR HAD BEEN ON! THE HARD HAT DIVING SUIT THEY PUT ON ME WAS FOR ONE OF THE MEN WORKING THERE, HE WASN’T A DWARF BUT WAS A LITTLE TALLER THAN A MIDGET. I WAS 11 AT THE TIME AND ABOUT 4’6”TALL!
I MIGHT ADD; MY NIECE BARBARA KLEEMEYER AND I WOULD GO ALL ALONG THE SHORE LINE TO THE SODA BOXES ON DOCKS AND IN STORES COLLECTING BOTTLE CAPS. WHEN WE GOT HOME WE WOULD SEPARATE THEM AND PUT THEM IN BOXES WE WOULD PICK UP ALONG THE WAY OR STOP BY THE LITTLE STORE THAT WAS AT ONE END OF THE CAMP GROUND TO GET EMPTY BOXES! WE WERE GOING TO MAKE SHOE SCRAPERS FOR THE MUD YOU GET ON SHOES DURING THE WINTER! BUT, FOR SOME REASON BY THE TIME WE GOT HOME THE BOTTLE CAPS WOULD HAVE DISAPEARED, WE THING MY DAD WOULD THROW THEM OUT WHILE PACKING!
THE PLANE CRASH HAPPENED IN 1941 AND SO DID THE BOAT THAT WAS THROWN ON THE JETTY ROCKS!
IN 1942, THE LAST YEAR WE WERE ALLOWED TO SET UP AT THE CAMP GROUND THERE WERE ALL KINDS OF ARMY, NAVY, COAST GUARD AND MARINES IN THE AREA! BEHIND THE CAMP GROUND WAS A HUGE NATURAL GAS TANK, THERE WERE 4 ARMY GUARDS WALKING AROUND IT INSIDE THE FENCE ALL THE TIME! OVER ON THE OCEAN SIDE WAS A BIG MILITARY CAMP SET UP AND THEY HAD ALL KINDS OF TRUCKS AND TANKS THAT THEY DROVE UP AND DOWN THE BEACH! THERE WERE 4-5 BIG (TO ME) ANTI AIRCRAFT GUNS SET UP ON THE SAND WITH SAND BAGS PILED AROUND THEM; THERE WAS A BLUFF OVERLOOKING HIGHWAY 101 AND THEY HAD BIG GUNS ON WHEELS UP THERE!
SOLDIERS AND SAILORS WALKED AROUND THE CAMP GROUND LOOKING FOR WHAT OR WHO I NEVER FOUND OUT! WHEN WE WOULD WALK TO THE FUNZONE IN BALBOA (DAYTIME ONLY BECAUSE WE WERE UNDER BLACKOUT RULES) THERE WERE SANDBAG CIRCLES WITH MACHINE GUNS AND OTHER TYPES OF WEAPONS! ALL THE MEN CARRIED RIFLES! TO AN 11 YEAR OLD IT WAS SCARY BUT INTERESTING BECAUSE I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT WAR WAS ALL ABOUT!
THE LAST THING I REMEMBER WAS WHEN I WAS SETTING ON THE BEACH WATCHING THESE BIG SHIPS GOING BY, MY DAD TOLD ME THEY WERE MINESWEEPERS AND SOME HAD BEEN BUILT AT THE MARINE SHOP I USED TO GO TO AND SOUTHWEST BOAT YARD! TILL I GOT OLDER I HAD NO IDEA WHAT A MINESWEEPER WAS!
ONE DAY I WAS WALKING AROUND THE DOCKS WHERE THE RICH PEOPLES BOATS WERE AND I NOTICED THAT A BUNCH OF THEM HAD BEEN PAINTED NAVY GRAY AND HAD NO BRIGHT THINGS ON THEM LIKE HORNS OR SIRENS, I WAS TOLD THEY HAD BEEN COMMANDEERED BY THE COAST GUARD AND NAVY FOR PATROL DUTY BETWEEN THE JETTY AND CATALINA ISLAND! SOME OF THEM HAD SMALL GUNS MOUNTED ON THE FORWARD DECK AND A MACHINE GUN ON EITHER SIDE OF THE PASSENGER COMPARTMENT AT THE STERN! MY DAD TOLD ME AFTER THE WAR THEY WOULD BE REPLACED OR PUT BACK IN THE SHAPE THE WERE WHEN TAKEN OVER FOR THE WAR EFFORT!
“THE PARADE OF LIGHTS”
ON THE LAST WEEK OF SUMMER AS EVERYONE WAS GETTING READY TO GO HOME THE BOAT OWNERS WOULD DECORATE THEIR BOATS WITH ALL KINDS OF LIGHTS AND SCENES! THEY HAD MANY SMALL BARGES THAT WERE DECORATED AND PULLED BY SMALLER BOATS THAT WERE DECORATED TOO! IN 1942 I WAS DOWN AT THE DOCK WHERE THE DAY FISHING BOATS CAME IN TO LET THEIR PASSENGERS OFF, THIS MAN WALKED UP TO ME AND ASKED IF I WOULD LIKE TO WORK ON HIS BOAT THAT WAS TOWING A BARGE? I ASKED HIM WHAT I WOULD BE DOING AND HE SAID KEEPING THE TOW ROPE FROM SNAGGING ON THE STERN AS HE KEPT THE BARGE STRAIGHT! I RAN HOME AND ASKED MY MOM IF IT WAS OK AND SHE SAID YES, BE CAREFUL!
THE PARADE STARTED ABOUT 6:30PM AND LASTED 2 ½ HOURS! THE SKIPPER OF THE LITTLE BOAT NAMED “THE BOBBY B” GAVE ME A LIFE JACKET AND TOLD ME IF I FELL OVERBOARD TO SWIM AWAY FROM THE PARADE AND HE WOULD HAVE THE COAST GUARD PICK ME UP! I DIDN’T FALL OVERBOARD AND HAD A BALL KEEPING THAT TOW ROPE CLEAR OF THE THINGS ON THE STERN! HE HAD HIS WIFE MAKE PEANUTBUTTER SANDWICHES AND I ATE 4 I THINK, I REALLY DIDN’T HAVE TIME TO BE EATING! AFTER THE PARADE WE TOOK THE BARGE BACK TO THE PLACE HE GOT IT AND THEY DROPPED ME OFF AT THE DAYBOAT DOCK! HE SHOOK MY HAND AND HIS WIFE HUGGED ME AND AS I WAS HEADING UP THE RAMP HE CALLED ME BACK AND ASKED IF I HADN’T FORGOTTEN SOMETHING? I LOOKED AROUND AND SAID I DIDN’T THINK SO AND HE HANDED ME $25.00 FOR HELPING! THIS WAS ABOUT 12:00 AM AND DID I CUT A TRAIL FOR THE CAMP GROUND, MY MOM WAS WAITING AND I WOKE EVERYBODY UP YELLING ABOUT MAKING $25.00!
WE GOT PACKED UP AND LEFT THE NEXT DAY, I NEVER EVEN KNEW THE SKIPPERS NAME EXCEPT TO CALL HIM SKIPPER! I ASKED ABOUT THE “BOBBY B” WHEN BILL, DICK AND I WERE THERE IN 1949! AS FAR AS ANYONE KNEW IT HAD BEEN TAKEN OVER BY THE COAST GUARD AND USED AS A MESSAGE RUNNER UP AND DOWN THE COAST BETWEEN SAN DIEGO AND CATALINA BECAUSE IT WAS SO FAST, IT COULD OUTRUN MOST OF THE COAST GUARD BOATS IN BALBOA HARBOR! NOBODY KNEW IF IT GOT SUNK OR WHAT HAPPENED TO IT!
MY BROTHER JERRY SAID AFTER I WORKED ON IT THAT IT WAS USED TO RUN MOON SHINE AND DRUGS!
THIS PRETTY WELL COVERS MY EARLY LIFE SUMMER STORY FROM 1936-1942! AS YOU CAN SEE I REALLY HAD A BALL!
OH YEAH! ONE MORE INCIDENT; MY DAD HAD A BOOKY JOINT ON HOLLYWOOD BLVD ACROSS FROM THE PANTAGES THEATER NEXT TO BERT WHEELER’S JOKE SHOP! HE WOULD COME DOWN TO THE BEACH AFTER HE CLOSED UP ON SATURDAY NIGHT AND HAD ALL THE WEEKS RECEIPTS WITH HIM! THIS WASN’T HIS MONEY, IT BELONGED TO THE SYNDICATE! HE USUALLY GOT TO THE BEACH AROUND MIDNIGHT AND WOULD GO TO ONE OF THE BATHROOMS THAT THE CAMP GROUND HAD UP AND DOWN THE ROAD! WELL, THIS ONE NIGHT HE WENT TO THE CLOSEST ONE TO THE TENT AND WHEN HE GOT DONE HE CAME BACK TO THE TENT AND GOT READY FOR BED! HE REACHED FOR HIS WALLET AND IT WAS GONE, IN HIS UNDERWARE HE RAN OUT OF THE TENT YELLING FOR EVERYONE TO GET UP! I WAS ALREADY AWAKE AND OUT IN THE KITCHEN WITH MY SISTER HENRIETTA. WE HAD NO IDEA WHAT HAD HAPPENED, WE THOUGHT HE WAS SICK OR SOMETHING! HE CAME WALKING BACK SLOWLY AND HAD HIS WALLET IN HIS HAND SMILING HE FOUND IT BEHIND THE TOILET BOWL! IF SOMEONE ELSE HAD FOUND IT I DON’T KNOW WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED BUT I CAN GUESS! HE TOLD US THE NEXT MORNING THE REASON HE YELLED FOR EVERYONE TO GET UP WAS HE THOUGHT HE WOULD HAVE US SEARCH ALL OVER THE PLACES HE’D BEEN! 24 EYES WOULD BE BETTER THAN 2 AND IN THE DARK!
THAT’S “30”FOR THIS ISSUE.
HOWARD
No comments:
Post a Comment