DAILY CHRONICLE # 20 VOL 9

HOWARD’S DAILY CHRONICLE

NUMBER 20 VOL 9

APRIL 20^TH 2008

WEATHER; WARM, MED HUMIDITY, 55/79 DEGREES

ANSWER TO POP QUIZ; PETER GRAVES WAS THE REAL NAME OF THE LEAD ACTOR IN “MISSION IMPOSSIBLE” AND JAMES “JIM” ARNESS OF “GUNSMOKE” IS HIS BROTHER!

POP QUIZ; IN THE HIT TV SERIES “TWO AND A HALF MEN” CHARLIE SHEEN PLAYS THE MAIN CHARACTER   WHAT RELATION IS HE TO  MARTIN  SHEEN OF “WEST WING”?

WE GOT THE INTREPID RUNNING TODAY AND STILL HAVE A FEW THING TO STRAIGHTEN OUT LIKE HAVING THE EXHAUST PUT UP IN PLACE AND WELD THE JOINTS THAT KELLY HAD TO CUT, IT GOES TO CBS TOMORROW FOR THIS! WHEN THIS IS DONE IT SHOULD SOLVE A LOT OF PROBLEMS, THESE NEW ENGINES DEPEND ON EXHAUST BACK PRESSURE AND WITH OPEN EXHAUST IT HAS NONE, THE TRANSMISSION TRIES TO DOWN SHIFT BUT THE COMPUTER DOESN’T KNOW WHAT’S GOING ON SO IT CAN’T TELL THE TRANSMISSION WHAT TO DO. THE O2 SENSORS ARE IN OPEN EXHAUST SO THEY CAN’T TELL THE COMPUTER TO GIVE MORE FUEL OR CUT BACK ON THE FUEL. UNTIL WE GET THE EXHAUST TIGHTENED UP THE CAR’S NOT GOING TO RUN RIGHT!

IT SURE RUNS GOOD, I TOOK IT DOWN OUR ROAD AND TURND AROUND AND CAME BACK, THE TRANSMISSION SHIFTS INTO ALL GEARS, ROUGH BUT IT DID IT SO WE LUCKED OUT! NOW WE CAN WORK ON THE COSMETICS AND MAKE IT LOOK GOOD!

I MAY GET A HOLD OF KELLY AND SEE IF HE CAN GET THE TWO WHEEL DOLLY AND WE’LL TAKE IT TO CBS ON THAT! I’M NOT SURE ABOUT DRIVING IT 10 MILES WITH OPEN EXHAUST! I’D SURE HATE TO SCREW SOMETHING UP AT THIS POINT!

KERRY STARTED ON HIS 3 WEEKS OFF THIS WEEKEND, WE DON’T KNOW IF THEY’RE GOING TO COME UP FOR A VISIT OR NOT? I KNOW THEY HAVE A LOT OF WORK TO FINISH IN FLORIDA SO I IMAGINE THAT’S WHERE THEY’LL BE GOING!

OF COURSE TIM WAS HERE THE LAST TWO WEEKENDS AND I’M SURE ELYSE HAS A LOT OF “HONEY DOES” FOR HIM. I WISH I COULD GO DOWN AND HELP HIM BUT, THE OLE’BOD JUST WON’T RESPOND LIKE IT USED TO! I KNOW HE’S GLAD TO SEE THE INTREPID DONE, WE BOUGHT IT FROM HIM ABOUT 6-8 MONTH AGO AND HAVE WAITED TO GET THE TRANSMISSION DONE SO WE CAN DRIVE IT!

SHANNON AND KONNER WERE HERE SATURDAY FOR A WHILE AND VISITED WITH MOM, I WAS WITH TIM AND KELLY WHILE THEY WORKED ON THE CAR!

GARY AND CHARLEEN LATINIS WERE HERE AFTER 5:00 MASS SATURDAY AND WE HAD A NICE VISIT! HE’S NOT SURE WHEN HE’S GOING BACK OUT ON THE ROAD, HE SAID IT WON’T BE FOR ATLEAST TWO WEEKS. DONICA PATRICK WON HER FIRST IRL RACE  YESTERDAY! THE LAST TIME GARY AND I HAD TALKED ABOUT WHY I’M NOT WATCHING NASCAR ANYMORE DONICA’S NAME CAME UP AND HE SAID SHE NEVER WINS, SHE JUST GETS IN THE WAY OF THE MEN (GUESS WHAT HE IS?) AND SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO COMPETE I’VE NEVER HEARD ONE OF THE MEN SHE COMPETES AGAINST SAY THAT, THEY ALL THINK SHE’S A GREAT COMPETITOR!

NOW THAT SHE’S HAD A TASTE OF WINNING SHE’LL GO ON AND WIN MORE RACES AND IT WOULDN’T SURPRISE ME TO SEE CHIP GANASSI RACING PICK HER TO DRIVE ONE OF THEIR DODGES IN NASCAR!

HAVEN’T HEARD FROM MIKE OR CINDY SO, I GUESS THEY’RE DOING OK, I’M SURE IF ANYTHING IMPORTANT HAPPENED THEY’D CONTACT US!

COLLEEN AND DICK ARE DOING GREAT, THEY’RE A GOOD MATCH! COLLEEN REALLY LOVES HER NEW JOB AND FROM THE WAY THEY’RE TREATING HER THEY LIKE HER JUST AS MUCH! DICK SPENDS MOST OF HIS TIME MOWING THE RUNWAY AND WORKING ON SOME OF HIS PROJECTS! I’M GOING TO TRY AND SPEND MORE TIME VISITING WITH HIM, HE’S REALLY INTERESTING TO TALK TO, OF COURSE WE HAVE A COMMON INTEREST, COLLEEN!

 

 

COMMON TOOL EXPLAINED

TO THE UNINITIATED, THE WORKSHOP CAN BE AN INTIMIDATING PLACE, FULL OF TOOLS YOU MAY NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH. TO HELP, HERE'S A HELPFUL EXPLANATION OF COMMON TOOLS AND THEIR USES.

DRILL PRESS: A TALL UPRIGHT MACHINE USEFUL FOR SUDDENLY SNATCHING FLAT METAL BAR STOCK OUT OF YOUR HANDS SO THAT IT SMACKS YOU IN THE CHEST AND FLINGS YOUR BEER ACROSS THE ROOM, DENTING THE FRESHLY-PAINTED VERTICAL STABILIZER WHICH YOU HAD CAREFULLY SET IN THE CORNER WHERE NOTHING COULD GET TO IT.

WIRE WHEEL: CLEANS PAINT OFF BOLTS AND THEN THROWS THEM SOMEWHERE UNDER THE WORKBENCH WITH THE SPEED OF LIGHT . ALSO REMOVES FINGERPRINTS AND HARD-EARNED CLECO CALLUSES FROM FINGERS IN ABOUT THE TIME IT TAKES YOU TO SAY, "OH RATS!"

ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: NORMALLY USED FOR SPINNING POP RIVETS IN THEIR HOLES UNTIL YOU DIE OF OLD AGE.

SKILL SAW: A PORTABLE CUTTING TOOL USED TO MAKE STUDS TOO SHORT.

PLIERS: USED TO ROUND OFF BOLT HEADS. SOMETIMES USED IN THE CREATION OF BLOOD-BLISTERS.

BELT SANDER: AN ELECTRIC SANDING TOOL COMMONLY USED TO CONVERT MINOR TOUCH-UP JOBS INTO MAJOR REFINISHING JOBS.

HACKSAW: ONE OF A FAMILY OF CUTTING TOOLS BUILT ON THE OUIJA BOARD PRINCIPLE. IT TRANSFORMS HUMAN ENERGY INTO A CROOKED, UNPREDICTABLE MOTION, AND THE MORE YOU ATTEMPT TO INFLUENCE ITS COURSE, THE MORE DISMAL YOUR FUTURE BECOMES.

AVIATION METAL SNIPS: SEE HACKSAW.

VISE-GRIPS: GENERALLY USED AFTER PLIERS TO COMPLETELY ROUND OFF BOLT HEADS. IF NOTHING ELSE IS AVAILABLE, THEY CAN ALSO BE USED TO TRANSFER INTENSE WELDING HEAT TO THE PALM OF YOUR HAND.

WELDING GLOVES: HEAVY DUTY LEATHER GLOVES USED TO PROLONG THE CONDUCTION OF INTENSE WELDING HEAT TO THE PALM OF YOUR HAND.

OXYACETYLENE TORCH: USED ALMOST ENTIRELY FOR LIGHTING VARIOUS FLAMMABLE OBJECTS IN YOUR SHOP ON FIRE. ALSO HANDY FOR IGNITING THE GREASE INSIDE THE WHEEL HUB YOU WANT THE BEARING RACE OUT OF.

TABLE SAW: A LARGE STATIONARY POWER TOOL COMMONLY USED TO LAUNCH WOOD PROJECTILES FOR TESTING WALL INTEGRITY.

HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: USED FOR LOWERING AN AUTOMOBILE TO THE GROUND AFTER YOU HAVE INSTALLED YOUR NEW BRAKE SHOES, TRAPPING THE JACK HANDLE FIRMLY UNDER THE BUM PER.

EIGHT-FOOT LONG YELLOW PINE 2X4: USED FOR LEVERING AN AUTOMOBILE UPWARD OFF OF A TRAPPED HYDRAULIC JACK HANDLE.

THAT’S “30” FOR THIS ISSUE.

HOWARD