HOWARD’S DAILY CHRONICLE
NUMBER 26 VOL 10
MAY 26TH 2008
WEATHER; HOT, HIGH HUMIDITY, 74/91 DEGREES
AS I REPORTED, WE HAD A COOKOUT TODAY MOM BROUGHT MY PLATE TO ME SO I COULD STAY OFF THE FOOT! BRATWERST, HUGE HAMBURGER, POTATOE SALAD (YANKEE STYLE), COLESLAW, CRAB SALAD, AND FRUIT SALAD TO TOP IT OFF! COLD DRINKS, BEER IF YOU WANTED IT!
TIM ELYSE AND THE KIDS WERE HERE, SHANNON AND KONNER, KELLY, GLENDA AND HALEY JO, COLLEEN BUT DICK WASN’T FEELING GOOD SO HE DIDN’T MAKE IT AND MOM AND I!
THE NEXT COOK OUT WILL BE THE 4TH OF JULY AND YOU’RE ALL INVITED!
TIM PUT THE RADIO IN THE INTREPID SO NOW THE ONLY THING LEFT ARE THE STRUTS AND SHOCKS, THEN OF COURSE THE ALIGNMENT! THE ACCLAIM IS STILL DOING A GOOD JOB SO WE’RE NOT IN TOO MUCH OF A HURRY EVEN THOUGH WE’RE ANXIOUS TO START DRIVING THE INTREPID!
I HAVE TO BE IN DALLAS AT THE VA AT 11:40 AM TUESDAY IF GARY LATINIS DOESN’T GET A LOAD OUT TOMORROW HE SAID HE’D TAKE ME! IF HE DOES I’LL PUT MY SHOE ON AND MOM AND I WILL GO IN OUR CAR! I’LL PUT THE BOOT CAST ON WHEN I GET THERE, I DON’T WANT TO CREATE ANY PROBLEMS BUT I JUST FEEL LIKE IT WAS OVERKILL ON THEIR PART, IT WAS FRIDAY BEFORE A 3 DAY WEEKEND AND EVERYONE WANTED TO GET OUT AS EARLY AS THEY COULD SO PUT THE BOOT CAST ON AND SEND ME ON MY WAY! LET ORTHOPEDICS HANDLE IT TUESDAY! I’LL BET THEY CAN’T FIND THE “SLIGHT BREAK” THEY SAY THEY SAW IN THE X-RAYS TAKEN IN BONHAM!
LOW STOCK
A STORE MANAGER OVERHEARD A CLERK SAYING TO A CUSTOMER, "NO, MA'AM, WE HAVEN'T HAD ANY FOR SOME WEEKS NOW, AND IT DOESN'T LOOK AS IF WE'LL BE GETTING ANY SOON."
ALARMED BY WHAT WAS BEING SAID, THE MANAGER RUSHED OVER TO THE CUSTOMER WHO WAS WALKING OUT THE DOOR AND SAID, "THAT ISN'T TRUE, MA'AM. OF COURSE, WE'LL HAVE SOME SOON. IN FACT, WE PLACED AN ORDER FOR IT A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO."
THEN THE MANAGER DREW THE CLERK ASIDE AND GROWLED "NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER SAY WE DON'T HAVE SOMETHING. IF WE DON'T HAVE IT, SAY WE ORDERED IT AND IT'S ON ITS WAY. NOW, WHAT WAS IT SHE WANTED?"
THE CLERK SMILED AND SAID, "RAIN."
OYSTERS
A LADY WENT RUNNING TO A DOCTOR WITH A BADLY SPOILED STOMACH.
"WHAT DID YOU EAT FOR DINNER LAST NIGHT?" ASKED THE DOCTOR.
"OYSTERS," SHE SAID.
"FRESH OYSTERS" ASKED THE DOCTOR.
"HOW SHOULD I KNOW?" SAID THE LADY
"WELL," ASKED THE DOCTOR, "COULDN'T YOU TELL WHEN YOU TOOK OFF THE SHELLS?"
"MY GOSH," GASPED THE LADY. "ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO TAKE OFF THE SHELLS?"
THAT’S “30” FOR THIS ISSUE
HOWARD
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