HOWARD’S DAILY CHRONICLE
NUMBER 12 VOL 12
JULY 12TH 2008
WEATHER; HOT, HIGH HUMIDITY, 74/98 DEGREES
KELLY GOT THE ACCLAIM DONE TODAY! HE STAYED ON IT TILL IT WAS FINISHED AROUND 7PM! MOM SAYS IT’S REALLY COOLING BUT WE’LL HAVE TO WAIT TILL TOMORROW TO BE SURE THERE ARE NO LEAKS! THERE SHOULDN’T BE ANY, EVERY THING IS NEW!
I WENT DOWN AND TOOK A LOOK AT THE EVAPORATOR COIL KELLY TOOK OUT AND DON’T SEE HOW IT EVER COOLED! THE CAR SAT OUT IN THE WEATHER FOR OVER TWO YEARS UNDER SOME TREES BEFORE WE PUT IT BACK ON THE ROAD! THE LEAVES FROM THE TREES FELL ON THE AIR INTAKE IN FRONT OF THE WINDSHIELD THEN WITH ALL THE RAIN AND SNOW WORKED THEIR WAY INTO THE DUCT WORK AND THEN TO WHERE THE COIL SETS! IT’S REALLY HARD TO BELIEVE TWO YEARS AGO ON OUR TRIP WE WERE IN HEAT UPWARDS OF 115 DEGREES AND THE A/C NEVER LET US DOWN AND UNTILL ABOUT TWO MONTH AGO IT WOULD FREEZE YOU OUT, MANY TIMES I HAD TO ADD THE HOT AIR FROM OUTSIDE TO TAKE THE CHILL OFF THE AIR COMING OUT OF THE VENTS! GOOD OLD CHRYSLER PRODUCTS! NOW IF WE CAN ONLY GET THE INTREPID FIGURED OUT! IT’S NOT THE CAR IT’S THE SERVICE IT DIDN’T GET FROM THE PREVIOUS OWNERS! FROM THE PAPER WORK THAT WAS IN THE CAR THEY LET THINGS GO UNTILL IT BROKE DOWN THEN TOOK IT IN AND GOT IT FIXED! I GUESS THEY NEVER HEARD OF “PREVENTIVE MAINTENANCE?”
MOM IS GOING TO PICK CHARLENE LATINIS UP FOR 8AM MASS IN THE MORNING! TIM FOUND OUT THE CHANNEL WHICH IS CARRYING THE MASS FOR ME TO WATCH, IT’S CHANNEL 370 IF YOU HAVE “DIRECT TV!”
KELLY IS OFF TOMORROW SO IT’LL BE A GOOD CHANCE FOR HIMTO REST UP AFTER WORKING ON THE ACCLAIM FOR THE LAST 5 DAYS! IF YOU FOLLOW THE STEPS IN THE MANUAL IT COMES A PART PRETTY EASY! THEN ALL THEY SAY IS; INSALLATION IS IN REVERSE! IN FACT THE BOOK SAYS; BECAUSE WORKING ON THE A/C IS SO DANGEROUS THEY SUGGEST YOU TAKE IT TO THE DEALER OF CERTIFIED REPAIR SHOP! THEY DON’T EVEN GIVE ANY SPECS ON THE A/C! WHAT WE USE THE BOOK FOR IS HOW TO PULL THE DASH, ONCE YOU GET IT OUT OF THE WAY YOU CAN SEE WHAT ELSE YOU NEED TO DO TO CHANGE THE EVAPORATIVE COIL AND HEATER COIL!
HARD OF HEARING
A MAN IS TALKING TO THE FAMILY DOCTOR. "DOC, I THINK MY WIFE'S GOING DEAF."
THE DOCTOR ANSWERS, "WELL, HERE'S SOMETHING YOU CAN TRY ON HER TO TEST HER HEARING. STAND SOME DISTANCE AWAY FROM HER AND ASK HER A QUESTION. IF SHE DOESN'T ANSWER, MOVE A LITTLE CLOSER AND ASK AGAIN. KEEP REPEATING THIS UNTIL SHE ANSWERS. THEN YOU'LL BE ABLE TO TELL JUST HOW HARD OF HEARING SHE REALLY IS."
THE MAN GOES HOME AND TRIES IT OUT. HE WALKS IN THE DOOR AND SAYS, "HONEY, WHAT'S FOR DINNER?" HE DOESN'T HEAR AN ANSWER, SO HE MOVES CLOSER TO HER. "HONEY, WHAT'S FOR DINNER?" STILL NO ANSWER HE REPEATS THIS SEVERAL TIMES, UNTIL HE'S STANDING JUST A FEW FEET AWAY FROM HER.
FINALLY, SHE ANSWERS, "FOR THE ELEVENTH TIME, I SAID WE'RE HAVING MEATLOAF!"
ECONOMICS PROFESSOR
AN ECONOMICS PROFESSOR AT SCHOOL HAD A STRICT POLICY THAT THE HOURLY EXAMINATIONS WERE TO BE COMPLETED AT THE BELL AND ANYONE WHO KEPT WRITING ON THEIR EXAM AFTER THE BELL WOULD TAKE A ZERO ON THE EXAM.
WELL, ONE GUY KEPT WRITING ON HIS EXAM FOR A WHILE AFTER THE BELL AND THEN CONFIDENTLY STRODE UP TO TURN IT IN. THE PROFESSOR LOOKED AT HIM AND SAID, "DON'T BOTHER TO HAND THAT PAPER IN... YOU GET A ZERO FOR CONTINUING AFTER THE BELL."
THE GUY LOOKED AT HIM AND SAID, "PROFESSOR, DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM!"
THE PROFESSOR REPLIED, "NO, AND I DON'T CARE IF YOUR DAD IS PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES...YOU GET A ZERO ON THIS EXAM"
THE GUY, WITH A ENRAGED LOOK ON HIS FACE, SHOUTED, "YOU MEAN YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHO I AM?"
THE PROFESSOR RESPONDED, "NO, I'VE NO IDEA WHO YOU THINK YOU ARE."
WITH THAT, THE GUY SAID "GOOD!" PLUNGED HIS EXAM INTO THE MIDDLE OF THE STACK OF OTHER STUDENT'S EXAMS, AND DID A HASTY RETREAT FROM THE EXAMINATION ROOM!
THAT’S “30” FOR THIS ISSUE.
HOWARD
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