DAILY CHRONICLE #14 VOL 12

HOWARD’S DAILY CHRONICLE

NUMBER14 VOL 12

JULY 14^TH 2008

WEATHER; HOT, HIGH HUMIDITY, 67/96 DEGREES

 

MOM HAD TO GO TO TOWN TODAY TO TAKE KYLIE AND SHANNON TO MHMR TO GET SOME PAPER WORK STARTED FOR KYLIE!

WHEN SHE GOT HOME I ASKED HOW THE CAR DID AND SHE SAID JUST FINE, EVERYTHING IS WORKING GOOD SO I GUESS I CAN PUT MY GUN UP, IVE BEEN GUN SHY THE LAST FEW DAYS WAITING FOR THE OTHER SHOE TO DROP!

 

NOW I’M GOING TO TRY AND FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENED TO THE INTREPID? WE’RE NOT GOING TO SPEND ANYMORE MONEY ON IT TILL IT’S RUNNING LIKE IT SHOULD, IT’LL JUST BE CHECKING THINGS OVER TO BE SURE THEY’RE IN THE RIGHT PLACES AND HOOKED UP RIGHT!

 

I’VE CHECKED THE WIRES TO THE CAMSHAFT POSITIONING SENSOR AND THEY’RE RIGHT, I’M GOING TO CHECK THE CRANKSHAFT POSITIONING SENSOR WIRES TOMORROW, I LOOKED AT THEM AND IT LOOKS LIKE THEY REMOVED THE PLUG AND TURNED IT OVER BUT I DON’T THINK IT WILL EVEN RUN IN THAT CONFIGURATION! I’LL USE MY METER TO CHECK FOR THE PROPER VOLTAGE AND WIRE LOCATION. ONE THING I HAVEN’T TRIED IS REMOVING THE 60 PIN PLUG FROM THE PCM (COMPUTER) AND LET IT SET 2 MINUTES SO THE COMPUTER CAN REPROGRAM ITSELF!

I KEEP GETTING THE FEELING WHEN THE REMOVED THE ANALYZER THEY BROKE THE GROUND CIRCUIT JUST LONG ENOUGH SO THE COMPUTER DOESN’T KNOW WHICH WAY TO GO! THESE NEWER CARS CONTROL THE GROUND INSTEAD OF THE POSITIVE LIKE THE OLDER BATTERY IGNITION ONES DID! ANYHOW, I’VE GOT TO MESS WITH IT TO SEE IF I CAN GET IT RUNNING LIKE IT WAS WHEN WE TOOK IT INTO HOYTE! INLESS SOMETHING SIMPLE HAPPENS A CAR DOESN’T JUST GO FROM RUNNING FINE TO RUNNING LIKE CRAP!

TIM IS COMING UP SATURDAY TO PICK UP HIS CHOP SAW AND DISC/BELT SANDER SO HE CAN GET ON THE REMODELING AT HIS HOUSE, HE SAID HE WANTS TO CHECK THE CAR OVER IF I HAVEN’T GOT IT FIXED! HE’LL HOOK UP THE DRB II AND CHECK THE CIRCUITS WITH THAT!

 

SECRETS OF THE TRADE

A MERCHANT TEACHES HIS SON THE SECRETS OF THE TRADE: "WHEN YOU CHARGE A CUSTOMER $100, AND HE PAYS YOU BY MISTAKE $200, YOU HAVE AN ETHICAL DILEMMA -- SHOULD YOU TELL YOUR PARTNER?"

 

WALKING THE BRICK

A POLICE MAN ON DUTY SAW A MAN WITH A BRICK ON A LEASH. BEING THE MAN THAT HE WAS HE WENT OVER AND SAID, "NICE DOG YOU'VE GOT THERE."

THE MAN REPLIED, "IT'S NOT A DOG, IT'S A BRICK, DUMMY!"

THE POLICEMAN SAID "I'M REALLY SORRY FOR WASTING YOUR TIME" FEELING EMBARRASSED AND STROLLED AWAY QUICKLY.

WHEN THE POLICEMAN WAS OUT OF SIGHT THE MAN BENT DOWN AND WHISPERED TO THE BRICK: "GOT HIM THERE DIDN'T WE ROVER?"

 

DOCTOR'S ORDERS

A GUY WALKS INTO A BAR AND APPROACHES THE BARMAN, "CAN I HAVE A PINT OF LESS, PLEASE?"

"I'M SORRY SIR," THE BARMAN REPLIES, LOOKING SLIGHTLY PUZZLED, "I'VE NOT COME ACROSS THAT ONE BEFORE. IS IT A SPIRIT?"

"I'VE NO IDEA," REPLIES THE GUY, "THE THING IS, I WENT TO SEE MY DOCTOR LAST WEEK AND HE TOLD ME THAT I SHOULD DRINK LESS."

THAT’S “30 FOR THIS ISSUE.

 

HOWARD