HOWARD’S DAILY CHRONICLE
NUMBER 8 VOL 12
JULY 8TH 2008
WEATHER; HOT, MED HUMIDITY, 73/97 DEGREES
MOM TOOK THE INTREPID TO TOWN THIS MORNING AND WHEN SHE GOT BACK SHE SAID SHE DIDN’T HAVE ANY PROBLEMS, IT PERFORMED JUST LIKE IT DID MONDAY WHEN WE DID ALL THE RUNNING AROUND! AFTER IT COOLED DOWN I WENT OUT AND PULLED THE THERMOSTAT HOUSING AND SURE ENOUGH THERE WASN’T A THERMOSTAT IN THE ENGINE SO I PUT THE ONE I FOUND IN THE TRUNK IN AND RAN IT TO SEE IF IT WAS OK AND IF IT WAS GOING TO OPEN? AFTER RUNNING FOR ABOUT 20 MINUTES THE GAGE CLIMBED TO THE THIRD MARK FROM THE BOTTOM AND STAYED THERE! THIS WAS SETTING STILL AND THE OUTSIDE TEMPERATURE WAS 97, BOTH FANS CAME ON AND THE ONE FOR THE A/C CYCLED 2-3 TIMES WHICH THE BOOK SAYS IT’S SUPPOSED TO DO! AS I WAS STANDING IN FRONT OF THE CAR I LOOKED DOWN AND THE HEADLIGHT LENSE WAS GONE OFF THE RIGHT HEADLIGHT! MOM WAS STANDING THERE AND I ASKED HER IF SHE BUMPED SOMETHING AND SHE SAID NO, SOMEONE MUST HAVE HIT THE CAR WHILE IT WAS PARKED AT THE STORE!
I’LL TAKE IT T0 R&D TOMORROW TO SEE ABOUT GETTING A GOOD HEADLIGHT OFF A WRECKED CAR! THIS WILL GIVE ME A CHANCE TO SEE IF IT RUNS ANY DIFFERENT ON THE ROAD! NOW MY PATCH ON THE PLASTIC SIDE TANK OF THE RADIATOR WILL REALLY BE TESTED! I HAD PUMPED THE RADIATOR UP TO 17 LBS AND IT HELD FOR 15 MINUTES BUT NOW WITH A THERMOSTAT IN THE SYSTEM THINGS MIGHT CHANGE, WE’LL SEE!
IT SURE FELT GOOD TO GET A WRENCH IN MY HAND AND DO SOMETHING USEFUL EVEN IF WAS JUST INSTALLING A THERMOSTAT!
KELLY GOT HOME AND DECIDED TO TRY OUT THE NEW SWIMMING POOL THEY BOUGHT INSTEAD OF WORKING ON THE ACCLAIM, I DON’T BLAME HIM! THEY DON’T AIR CONDITION THE SHOP OUT AT TEREX WHERE HE WORKS SO BY THE TIME HE GETS HOME HE’S BEEN HOT ALL DAY AND DESERVES TO COOL DOWN! AS LONG AS THE INTREPID IS DOING SO GOOD WE’LL NOT HURRY HIM ON THE ACCLAIM! I JUST HOPE HE CAN REMEMBER HOW IT GOES BACK TOGETHER! HE,HE,HE! HE’S GOT THE SECTION OUT OF THE BOOK WITH PICTURES AND A LITTLE BIT OF WRITING BUT, THE PICTURES ARE THE IMPORTANT THING!
I’LL SURE BE GLAD WHEN I GET MY AMPLIFIED PHONE BACK FROM THE VA OR ANOTHER ONE IF THEY CAN’T REPAIR THE ONE I TOOK THEM!
MOM AND SHANNON ARE GOING TO TRY AND GO TO A MOVIE TOMORROW IF KONNER IS OK! HE WASN’T FEELING TOO GOOD YESTERDAY, TO MUCH HEAT I GUESS! THE LITTLE FOLKS CANT STAND THIS HEAT JUST LIKE US OLD FOLKS CAN’T!
PROTECTED STATUS
BOSS, TO FOUR OF HIS EMPLOYEES: "I'M REALLY SORRY, BUT I'M GOING TO HAVE TO LET ONE OF YOU GO."
BLACK EMPLOYEE: "I'M A MINORITY."
FEMALE EMPLOYEE: "AND I'M A WOMAN."
OLDEST EMPLOYEE: "FIRE ME, BUSTER, AND I'LL HIT YOU WITH AN AGE DISCRIMINATION SUIT SO FAST IT'LL MAKE YOUR HEAD SPIN."
THEY ALL TURN TO LOOK AT THE HELPLESS YOUNG, WHITE, MALE EMPLOYEE, WHO THINKS A MOMENT, THEN RESPONDS: "I THINK I MIGHT BE GAY?"
CRASH LANDING
A PLANE WAS FLYING THROUGH THE JUNGLE WHEN SUDDENLY THE ENGINE STALLED. THE PILOT EJECTED AND DRIFTED GENTLY DOWN TO LAND.
UNFORTUNATELY HE LANDED IN A LARGE COOKING POT WHICH WAS GENTLY SIMMERING OVER A LOW FIRE.
ALL THE LOCAL TRIBESMEN TURNED TO LOOK AT HIM UNTIL THE CHIEF, BLINKING IN DISBELIEF ASKED, "WHAT'S THIS FLIER DOING IN MY SOUP?"
THAT’S “30 FOR THIS ISSUE.
HOWARD
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